Month: March 2019

The Womb Speaks

For years I kept lining myself in anticipation of nurturing a living, breathing entity. Years went by but nothing happened. I kept lining and shedding … eternally hopeful … waiting, longing.

Somewhere the prolonged wait and hope soured into disappointment.

I have been withheld from following my natural course and the flush of hormones are beginning to get all mixed up and erratic. Soon the clockwork rhythm will stutter. Soon you will realise that it is the end of the road and there is no going back and I will remain unfulfilled this lifetime.

Despite my frustration and my feeling of rejection, I want you to know that I see your struggle. The world is a shitty place. Opinion, judgement and shaming are real and you are the one dealing with them. I’m working on my deep seated anger by letting go. I’m learning from you. Sometimes, you just take life in your stride and move on and find joy in what you have rather than what you don’t. And I have you.

lovingly,

your womb

Personality Typos

You wake up one fine morning and the dissonance that you sometimes felt but brushed aside, suddenly turns into a full fledged aggravation … and you sigh and once again tell yourself … that gut … it was right, as usual.

You meet people socially. Everything seems fine. You’re a drink down and you fail to notice the maniacal gleam; the bloated gloater; the brisk brush-off to the pet; the skittish eyes; the flash of anger …

Later, this personality blooms before your eyes when a trigger presents itself. When control is well past its tipping point. The fleeting signs manifest into the real person behind the smiling facade.

And then it’s ‘ouch’ time …

These personality ‘typos’ are not an aberration. It takes all kinds and this is one of a kind. They add spice to regular fare but are best tolerated in small doses. If the dose exceeds, the risk of not just being at the receiving end but being pushed over the edge into taking up cudgels is inevitable. Unless you’re a Zen master.

I should have been warier so my warrior wouldn’t feel the need to come out and play!